I can actually hear the men and women sniggering in the galleries as they read this! The common thought in women's minds being, "Which world are you living in?
Men are hardwired to sex and intimacy without sex is really not worth the effort to them! Cuddling is fine but it does not get them the physical release they get with sex!
Men are thinking, "Cuddling is fine during those times of the months......but I need sex! And if I cannot have sex, I'm not going to waste time only on cuddling when I can have the whole hog with some other woman!" I am partially right and partially wrong!
You have to work to build your intimacy without sex and that takes a lot of hard work!
A few ways to make this work are
Touch
Be as physically close as you can without sex. Calming massages, cuddle while watching a movie and holding hands while talking or even cutting each others hair is great ways to get intimate without sex! Getting to know each other is half the fun of intimacy!
Hold
Hold each other as much as possible. Try kissing each other good night or when you are leaving the house. Works great to keep you connected without sex.
Be emotionally intimate
Write each other sweet poems and then wait up for each other to come back home. Share secrets and office gossip. This can really relax you while at the same time keep you informed about what you both are doing.
Banish distractions
Take away the TV, unplug phones and mobiles and send away for takeout food and just sit and talk while looking into each others eyes! That really boots the intimacy levels.
Be warned!
Intimacy and sex is hardwired into the male sex drive as a related object. For them sex means love and physical intimacy. For them more sex means more intimacy! You can get close to them without sex but physical communication in every relationship is as important as an emotional communication.
Sex is an inherent part of every marriage and long-term relationship but it should not be something you do just to relive the tension! Physically being in contact with your partner can be really relieving even if you do not have sex and it works!
